There’s this moment that only someone with Type 1 diabetes in pregnancy will understand.
You walk into the clinic, on time, maybe even early.
You’ve fasted.
You’ve logged.
You’ve double-checked your CGM.
And yet… there’s still a little knot in your stomach.
What will they say today?
Will they praise or question?
Will I leave feeling lighter… or heavier?
For many of us, medical appointments aren’t just “routine check-ups.”
They’re emotional battlegrounds.
They hold so much tension: hope, fear, shame, effort, vulnerability—all rolled into 20 minutes with someone who may or may not understand what you’re really going through.
Why do these appointments feel so heavy?
Because you care.
Because you’re trying.
Because every number feels like it reflects your worth as a mother.
Let’s say it clearly: it’s not just about the A1c.
It’s about the mental gymnastics you go through every single day to keep you and your baby safe.
And when those efforts are overlooked, or worse, judged!! It can be heartbreaking.
Sometimes, you leave an appointment and cry in the car.
Sometimes, you shut down and say, “I’m fine.”
Sometimes, you go silent and blame yourself for not being “more in control.”
If you’ve ever felt any of this, you are so not alone.
What guilt ACTUALLY sounds like for many T1D mums:
“I should’ve caught that spike sooner.”
“Why do I always go low before lunch?”
“They must think I’m careless.”
“Other women manage better than me.”
But here’s the truth:
Most of the time, the people in that clinic room don’t know what it’s like to live in your body.
They don’t know the alarms at 3am, the anxiety before eating, the pressure to get it all right while also just… being pregnant.
You’re not failing. You’re carrying a load that most people can’t see.
Let that sink in.
Your efforts are constant. Your body is working double. Your brain is doing calculations all day long while still making space for joy, baby kicks, planning, work, home, and so much more.
So no, your glucose numbers are not the whole picture.They’re a fraction of the incredible things you’re doing.
How to release the guilt (even a little)
Here are a few gentle things that might help when you’re spiralling after an appointment:
💛 Pause and name it.
“This was a hard appointment.”
Just naming it reduces the emotional charge.
💛 Remember what they don’t see.
You’re not a graph. You’re a whole person doing her best.
💛 Visualise handing the judgement back.
Close your eyes. Imagine giving their opinion back to them like handing over a bag that was never yours to carry.
💛 Speak kindly to yourself after.
One of my favourites:
“I’m allowed to be human and be a good mum.”
💛 Come back to calm.
This might be a walk, a stretch, a guided relaxation (like this one I made just for you)—anything that helps your nervous system feel safe again.
Final thoughts
You are not your data.
You are not your clinic notes.
You are not behind, or broken, or bad at this.
You are growing a baby while managing a full-time medical condition.
That takes strength most people will never understand.
If your last appointment left you feeling heavy, you’re not alone.
And if you’re looking for a gentler way to prepare for what’s ahead, I’d love to support you.
You might also like:
Want to talk it through?
You’re welcome to book a 30-minute Calm Birth Clarity Chat with me.
There’s no judgement, just space to be honest about what’s been hard and how I can support you with calm, realistic tools.
Or come and say hi over on Instagram @Hypnobirthing_aby. My inbox is open.
With love and so much gentleness,
Aby x